Two

DARTH VADER CHANCES UPON A VORTEX IN A RERIDGERATOR.

“No,” he thought, “if all of the lovely little unicorns are radioactive, that means that I only have hours to find a cure...”
His head was a tangle of lies and questions that he could not comprehend. With time slipping by, he knew without a doubt, that he would die. He had only just begun to live his life. After moving to the Dark Side (the world filled with unicorns) he felt refreshed. He could start anew. But now, with the impending doom closing in on him, he didn’t have a chance. Not a single godforsaken chance in the world.
How would he spend his last fleeting moments? He had no idea. Suddenly a thought came to him... He was famished. That’s what being an evil dictator would do to a person. He knew that he should eat before dying. Who wants to die hungry? Not Darth Vader, that’s for sure.
Slowly he made his way to the kitchen. “A Twinkie! That’s what I’ll have. Nothing better to get your mind off of a slow painful death than a delicious pastry treat, That’s what I always say. And a yellow one of all things!” This made Darth Vader quite happy. “I’ll never be sad again.” he proclaimed.